I have been trying to follow Earnest Hemingway's sound advice to: "write drunk, edit sober". Like most I am a funnier, sassier asshole while I've got the drunks, so being the dumb drunk fuck that I have thought: to hell be the sober bit - so basically I have been drunk since Thursday.
Now I have to deal with kids with a hangover - kids, with a hangover (sometimes comas really count). Here's a short list I have just compiled to help you get through you fucking hangover day - or as i like to call it: Sunday through Saturday.
- Hurry and eat has much as you can immediately before you sober-up. You know that fun stage when you wake-up and are still a little drunk but basically just a total moron. You have to fill you belly with greasey goodness at this stage before *WHAM!* You sober-up and the hangover kicks in.
- Shit, shower, shave: I learnt this from dating an Australian. Australians are classy like that.
- Get out of the house. Nothing is worse for a hangover than letting it fester.
- Try and pawn your kids off of friends, family, or whoever will take the little shits while you sit on your ass watching Project Runway.
- Exercise, sweating out a hangover is a good way to beat that bitch.
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